Many guys feel that they don’t possess certain qualities that women look for in men, and they wonder if they should even try to pursue dating. If you’re going through a dry spell in your love life or have just never had any success at all, don’t give up. It’s likely that there are many ways you could improve your chances of attracting women that you haven’t taken the time to learn about, or you haven’t put enough effort into making the necessary changes. Here are 5 tips to help you more effectively attract women.
1. Don’t look desperate
A common problem that men have when they first meet a woman that they’re interested in is their brain will kick into overdrive trying to come up with clever things to say or other ways to impress her. If a woman gets the sense that you’re dying to go out with her, you will be perceived as less valuable. People desire things that are more difficult to obtain, and they take things for granted when they’re easy to get.
Attractive women are used to guys being attracted to them, so they will notice you more if they don’t pick up on this from you. Also, when you seem to be completely awestruck by her beauty, it will seem like you very seldom succeed with women of her caliber, and this conveys inferiority. Rather than trying to impress the girl with bragging or win her with compliments, just try to create a comfortable interaction where she doesn’t feel like you’re hitting on her or desperate to get her. When a woman feels comfortable talking with you, she will be much more likely to perceive you as a possible romantic partner.
2. Take care of the essentials
Some things are easy to fix, such as using mouthwash, whitening your teeth, cleaning up your hairstyle and other basic grooming. Consider your wardrobe. Do you know how to color-coordinate and make the right kind of wardrobe choices for your occupation and lifestyle? Learn some basic essentials about choosing the clothing that will make you look like you have a good sense about your appearance.
If you’re not blessed with a naturally fit physique, it will definitely help to get in better shape. You don’t have to be ripped to get a date with an attractive girl, but being at a healthy weight means you will look better in your clothes, and you will carry yourself with more strength and confidence if you’re physically fit. Also, if you join a gym, women will perceive you as someone who has self-discipline and self-esteem.
3. Reputation is key
When women consider dating a man, they tend to think more about the long-term implications. Men are thrilled just to hook up with a hot woman, but women tend to think about how a man would be in a relationship. She thinks about how trustworthy the man would be and how he might function as a potential father to her children.
A woman also considers how her social status and social life will be affected by dating you. If you have a reputation for being a womanizer, a cheapskate or any other negative character traits within her circle of acquaintances, it will hurt your chances of attracting her. Try to always treat people the way you would like to be treated in order to be viewed as a decent person.
4. Social proof
One of the best ways to show up on a woman’s radar as a potential romantic partner is when other women find you attractive. This is proof that you have some traits that make you at least somewhat desirable. If a woman sees an attractive girl giving you attention, she is likely to start noticing you rather than being oblivious to your existence.
It’s not always possible for this scenario to occur, so you could just casually mention some women you have dated in the past. Don’t make it the topic of your conversation, but work this former girlfriend in as part of a story or an illustrative example of something you’re explaining to the woman you want to attract.
5. Confidence
I’m sure you’ve heard this one before. Confidence is attractive, especially in men because it is perceived as masculinity. Confidence can be difficult to define because there are a lot of ways to convey this trait. A simple way to define it is: confidence is a lack of fear to confront something and a feeling that you are likely to succeed at what you’re attempting to do.
Approaching a woman whom you find truly gorgeous can be very intimidating and even terrifying if you think she’s out of your league. If she is a stunning beauty, she is used to men being nervous or shy around her, so, if you can make eye contact and seem completely unafraid of her, she is likely to be impressed by your confidence.
If you’re a shy person, this is something you will have to learn to overcome. The old saying goes: “fake it ’till you make it.” Even if you’re terrified, try to be calm and introduce yourself without betraying any of that fear. You might find that she will smile and be eager to engage in conversation.
Women like to test your confidence sometimes. As a potential mate, she would like someone who could protect her and her children in the face of danger, so they might want to test your strength and confidence in an adverse situation. They might initially give you a cold response or try to brush you off to see if you’re confident enough to plow ahead and keep trying. If you continue on by making a joke to try and break the ice, you might find that she will laugh and become much more interested in talking with you after you pass her initial test.